Can I comfortable date someone am not physically attracted to? Can physical attraction grow over time? how can I become physically attracted to someone? These have been questions many people ask in relationships.
Though, Some see it as a waste of time while some see it as being deceptive especially if the person in question is madly in love them. Let’s say that you are dating someone and there is a lack of physical chemistry from the start.
Now, this person has all the quality you can ever desire in a person and you are spiritual, emotional and intellectually compatible. You can connect with them and even allow yourself to be vulnerable around them.
But when it comes to physical compatibility, it is zero. They are short, fat and ugly when you desire the opposite, you even have no desire to see them naked.
This is what I got for you…….
First, don’t shut yourself off from someone like that just because you don’t feel that sense of passion right away. Dating someone who you’re not initially drawn to can be an eye-opening experience. I tell you, you might find yourself in a new and interesting relationship with someone you never thought you’d enjoy being with.
The most important ingredient we put in our Relationship is not what we say or what we do, but what we are
Is it bad to not be physically attracted to someone you’re Dating?
Well, not really..…
If you go on a date with someone and feel intellectually attracted but not physically attracted to them, You can still build a lasting relationship.
Listen, I am not saying that you should try to force a relationship with someone who you are not attracted to from the start. Not at all, of course, you don’t go on date after date after date hoping for a spark.
However, you don’t have to cut things off after just one date. If you felt an emotional connection but the physical chemistry wasn’t there, it’s possible you two can build to that.
Moreover, starting on this track can pave the appropriate changes needed to build a lasting relationship in which the compatibility in every aspect will be 100%.
Now, if you are dating someone you’re not physically attracted to and you really want to make the relationship work, Here are some strategies you can employ. You can also call them TIPS.
What is Physical Attraction in Relationship
According to Pandagossips.com Physical attraction is very important in romantic relationships. Physical attraction is the degree of a person’s physical characteristics that are beautiful for any particular person.
When people search for a romantic partner, psychology says that people tend to choose someone who finds them physically attractive. Although men are more consciously looking for physical attractiveness, it has been found that women also stress the importance of physical attractiveness.
Psychology says that physical attractiveness is more important than education, humor, kindness, and intelligence.
People tend to associate a more attractive person with a happier life than a less attractive person because people associate positive qualities with attractiveness. Below are some bad effects of a lack of physical attraction in the relationship.
- It leads to Respect
- Also it can lead to lack of Affection
- Not having an attraction in a relationship can bring about Poor Sex Life
Now, having understood more about physical attraction in relationship lets dive into these tips proper but before we do that I need you to answer this question with all honesty. You don’t have to inbox me with your answer or tell a friend, I just want you to tell yourself the truth
Why Am I Really Dating This Person?
Are you really with this person just because you need a friend because he wants to be with you or because you truly love everything about the person except the look? You just lonely? Are you afraid you won’t find anyone else? You should be able to define whatever you are doing with someone for crying out loud! there is a huge difference between friendship and dating.
I have heard people say ” He is not my spec, am just dating him. Besides he knows that we are just friends”. My dear, don’t be mad with me if I tell you that you are just confused.
The only people that you can be intellectually attracted but not physically attracted to are your friends who you don’t have sex with.
The whole point of friendship is that you have a connection with someone that doesn’t lead to romance.
When you are physically attracted to someone you can also have a good friendship with, that is part of the foundation for a solid, romantic relationship.
If you think he is the perfect person for you, maybe he calls when he says he will. He takes you on interesting dates. He texts back in a flash. He’s kind, considerate, smart, a great personality. And the only problem is YOU ARE NOT PHYSICALLY ATTRACTED TO HIM. You are not yet completely excited about the relationship.
How to become physically attracted to someone?
Now let’s explore these 11 acts to take when dating someone you’re not physically attracted to
Be Truthful to yourself
Be honest to yourself about what you want, things that can make you find someone not attractive. Now carefully determine the possibility of you changing those things if your partner has any.
If the person has permanent traits or behaviors that you don’t like, then you should decide if it’s worth it to start a relationship with them. Traits like a person’s style, hygiene and manners can be altered over the course of a relationship.
Note, Traits relating to a person’s physical attractiveness or personality will be very difficult to change and will likely remain the same throughout the duration of a relationship.
Spend time to study them
If you are dating someone you are not physically attracted to and you desire growing old with him or her, work on finding those special qualities that make them the perfect partner for you.
You got to be patient enough if you truly love this person because people don’t unfold everything about their personality in a day. find out those sweet qualities and relay on them.
For instance, someone who is loyal and supportive will always be there for you in a relationship.
Discover what you have in common with your partner
This is very important when you want to be physically attracted to someone you are not. This can be your common traits, interests or goals. I tell you, it is always fun being with someone your interests and goals align.
However, you can tell them the most important things you like, what you can crave for, and also try finding out about theirs. If you can find some common ground, you’ll be able to have interesting conversations about things that both of you are passionate about. Introduce them to your favorite bands. they can even share your personal values.
Think of how you feel around them
You can easily connect with someone that makes you feel special and loved. even if you are not physically connected with this person, think about how you feel around them, what the always tell you when you re moody or angry.
Think about how they listen to every one of your stories, complains and even nagging sometimes without interruption or snubbing you. And also the confidence you get because they are around you. Believe me, it may be wise to overlook physical appearance if they make you feel great about yourself.
Don’t Judge with what you see Now
The problem of having no physical attraction in your relationship can actually be dealt with in so many ways. Note that attraction is a mere feeling, your attraction toward something can change with time because feeling is what comes and goes.
You will agree with me that someone you might be attracted to today by tomorrow, the feelings can just fade away which means, you can develop feelings tomorrow for someone you are not physically attracted to today.
Therefore you have to think about the long-term effect of the relationship. himIntense attraction to someone usually only lasts for the first few months of a relationship. Even if you’re not attracted to this person now, can you grow to love someone you are not attracted to? can you have a good relationship without physical attraction?
Have a conversation
Don’t think you can have an instant attraction to someone that you may be started dating.
So don’t ask if its normal for you to fall in love with someone you are not physically attracted because you can achieve that by maintaining a healthy conversation.
Ensure that both of you are on the same page. Let them know exactly how you feel. Ask them how they feel about the situation and be sure to listen intently to everything they say.
Don’t be quick in Judging them
Don’t judge a book by its cover..
A lady once told me that the major problem she is facing in her relationship is that she is not attracted to her boyfriend although they have been dating for two months. When I asked her what she think was actually wrong, she said
“I like him but not physically attracted because he always gives me reasons to doubt his love for me. He might not be that right guy for me”.
Now, this is what people sometimes get wrong. You don’t know everything about someone in just a glimpse. To build a solid relationship, you got to give it time, devout time to it and spend quality time to understanding your partner.
Don’t be quick to judge someone’s personality. See who the person really is.
Now, this is what it does…….
It gives you a sense of humor and brings that positivity mindset, You will start thinking that there is every tendency that it’s going to work out.
Tell them if you don’t see the relationship going anywhere. The longer you wait to let them know, the more you could hurt their feelings.
It’s not fair to lead someone on if you’re just keeping them around until someone better comes along.
If one person expects a passionate relationship while the other person is just looking for a caretaker, the relationship could end in a disastrous breakup.
Have a Mindset Change
Your perception about things and people especially matters alot. Notice this, you can find someone that your not physically attracted to become more attractive when you don’t spend all your precious time and energy trying to find their flaws.
Are you focusing on every imperfection that a person has in order to rank their looks? If so, you could be training your brain to look for people’s flaws rather than to appreciate the whole picture. Look for what you do like about a person’s looks rather than what you don’t like.
Remember that looks fade
If you’re looking for someone to be with long-term, you might want to take their physical attractiveness out of the equation. People’s looks change over time.
Note, when you decide who to date based on their appearance rather than their personality, you might find that you have nothing in common with them in the future.
Some physical traits do show aspects of a person’s character. If a person is very physically fit, it may show you that they are committed to taking care of their body and can someday commit to taking care of you.
Spice up your Dates
One reason you may be in love but not attracted to your partner physically might be you don’t make ur dating interesting and exciting.
It will be very difficult for you to connect with someone or get attracted to someone sexually and physically when your each of your dates is always like you are in an interview.
Also, spice your date with different exciting things. Try something new, like ideas, experiences. It’s easier to break the touch barrier on these types of dates and a stimulating environment makes for better conversation and organic interaction.
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